he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
whose ass print is on the piano?
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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