why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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