she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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