so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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