So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
