Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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