Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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