Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
