honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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