can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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