I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
