actually, I'm a sock model
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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