I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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