I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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