elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
