Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
