THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
