I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
