We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
People in love make me want to vomit
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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