I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
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And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
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I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
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