ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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