just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
