Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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