I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
