Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
