Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
