Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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