why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize