Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
