Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize