): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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