i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
