Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
