it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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