He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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