at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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