I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
