just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
