So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
