He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
