Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
