Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
