i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
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