Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
