Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
You pole danced in your parka.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize