You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
