Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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