your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
id be glad to
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
