am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
