so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize