Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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